HR CONSULTING FOR improving recruiting processes

Everything I need to know I learned from the housewives…

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I’m guilty. I occasionally (every time I catch a full day marathon so I can squeeze two seasons worth of drama into one day) participate in the event we know as housewife spectating. Snub your nose at me if you will, but there is something about these tan, trash talking, hair dyed, working, unmarried “housewives” that reels me in. I think it’s because they provide me with so many life lessons. No seriously, everything I need to know to survive the workplace I learned from the housewives. Dr Seuss has nothing on these attention craved 15 minute of famers… take note.

Don’t sneak into the White House (Salahi we are looking at you!) It’s never a good idea to do something illegal, especially when its going to be public! Your reputation will become your organizations reputation, keep that in mind.

Tweet about someone-and you will have to own your words (Teresa, thank you for providing us with so many life lessons). You can’t deny it if we have proof you said. Cool down before you tweet or update Facebook (and in some cases text). Think before you speak or you may have to answer for those words you blasted from an emotional place.

Dont hide money problems from your other half (well… just about all of the housewives) HELLO!? How many housewives have we seen going through a divorce now because of money issues? In the midst of a bankruptcy? C’mon MAN! You can’t move have any kind of meaningful relationship when you hide big secrets like that from your partner (in business or life). Not just in money either. It’s okay to voice a problem. Collaborate with your key players and lets come up with a solution, don’t avoid it or try to fix it on your own. Here I will tie this into another perspective of decision-making without collaboration: Don’t relocate the Kings without anyones say so! Maloof! While it is incredibly unreasonable to include an entire fan base in the decision-making process you may want to come up with a way to go through the process publicly and make them feel like they were at least considered. If your decision is going to have an impact on that many people at once, don’t be afraid to share that burden with them. Great leaders state and share the burden.

Flipping tables is not the best solution (Settle down Teresa) Okay, so this links up with “emotional tweeting”, but the point is there are better ways to get your point across than flipping tables! Have a calm down moment and think before you act. Put together a plan of action to state your purpose and how you feel about an issue. Throwing a temper tantrum will likely turn your co workers or employees against you and cause them to lose respect for you.

Practice your public speaking (courtesy Alexis). Umm… There are so many… ummm.. things I can say about this one, ya know? I can’t keep that theme up past one sentence, but a lack of preparation shows and your peers, coworkers, employees, etc. will remember that. 2 quick points: If you don’t prepare you are ultimately projecting to your audience that you don’t really care. & you look like an idiot. You may feel foolish practicing your speech or presentation in front of the mirror, but you will look more foolish in public if you didn’t do those practice runs. What’s that age-old saying-preparation is the key to success? Maybe there is something to that…

Don’t invite a stripper without telling mom first (Phaedra a southern belle? not this time sweetheart!). Oh, how do I tie this one in with the workforce lesson? Don’t let your boss be surprised by anything (thank you Bobbi) and certainly not a stripper at the dinner table. If your boss needs to know its simple: inform them/include them. ‘Nuff said.

Don’t date an employee (Gretchen-either fire Slade, like really separate him from your business OR break up with him!) This is not a good idea for obvious reasons! Of course I have my own beliefs on “falling in love” and yada yada so I buy NO excuse in this arena. In the staffing world when we get a client (particularly mfg) where we will have a lot of employees I always throw out to them “We do not run a dating service”… Why? Because we  do not run a dating service. Quite frankly I have more important things to do than have a meeting with you and my client about the 3rd Ashley in the facility that you are dating and how the other two are going to kill you for cheating on them and devise a way to separate the 4 of you and keep production going and morale up. Stop it, just stop it. No I’m not the heartless HR person that no one wants to see, but I’m the HR person no one wants to see when there is workplace drama resulting from a relationship that started after they were told I do not run a dating service. And my goodness, if you are in a position above other employees direct reports are ALWAYS off-limits. Think big picture here and scroll up a few lessons to your reputation and your organizations reputation.

If you are determined-you CAN make it happen (Go Bethenny! #TeamSkinnyGirl) No matter how many people don’t buy your vegan cookies or refuse to support you or acknowledge your baking efforts you may one day stumble upon the genius idea of Skinny Girl cocktails and ditch the real housewives and all their drama for good to run your empire! Make a goal. Do you want it? I mean do you really want it? Then make it happen! Everyone is capable, your drive and determination can set you apart from everyone else.

So I left your favorite housewives out? My bad, that was intentional. I don’t watch the other ones. Please refrain from going “Oklahoma on me”!

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